Its been awhile

So its been a hot second. So much has happened from the last time that I wrote anything on this site. So to start with I went on another missions trip to Haiti, and I fell into a deeper love with this country then I could ever describe. This place is one of the most inviting and loving countries that I have ever experienced, if you're in the right place that is. If you are in the village and surrounding area then you will fall in love with ever single person you meet. But if you are in capital of the country and other places then good luck. Those places are filled with some of the rudest and most impatient people that you will meet. Kinda like here in America. I just found out that I might be staying in the country for the entire summer which would be amazing and such a wonderful experience. Another exciting thing is that I GOT A JOB. So just today actually May 22 2019 I worked my first day at the new job and I absolutely love it. Its called Jeans The Right Plant Place, and its a nursery greenhouse gift shop type thingy. So today I got to learn alot about flowers and plants which is something that im very found of and I have special memories with my grandmas helping them plant their flowers. The job is something new and exciting and Im really looking forward to seeing where it will take me. Another huge thing that makes me want to cry just writing about it is the fact that my sister graduated last week. See me and my sister have a special bond and we can just read each other and she is the closest thing that I have to a best friend. Shes the one that I tell everything and the one that I share all my hope and dreams with. She has always been there when I needed someone to vent to and someone to cry to. She is such an amazing role model and such an amazing onder sister, Im sad to see her go but I'm excited to see where life takes her. Hey guess what, I'm officially a licensed driver. Yes it took me awhile but I got there and boy am I ready to hit the road. The only down side is ummm the price of gas and the fact that my job is pretty far away but I will get over it and us the lemons that life gives me. Ok so I think thats all that happened in my life thanks for listening to me rant see you next time.

Mission Work

IM GOING TO HAITI!!!!! I can not tell all of you how excited I am to be going to Haiti in a week and I am so ready to go. The last time I went was about 3 years ago I think and I've wanted to go to Haiti since then. This time around I will be going to Haiti with my mom, my sister, my grandma, my sisters best friend, and two other girls who I'm really excited to get to know these two girls.

I think that there is such a huge importance in missions work both were you live and other places. I also think that doing the work that Christ has asked us to do is important to. HE says in Matthew 28:19 "Therefore and make disciples of all nations baptizing them in the name of the Father the Son and the Holy Spirit." I have taken this verse to heart and I really think that we are supposed to do as we are told.

I know that there are people out there that think that we need to fix our country first and then focus on the other countries. Those people must not think about the fact that this country has money and resources and a government that is trying to help, but in third world countries they dont have these things. They have nothing and the troops and the missionaries that go there to help are the only thing that are keeping hundreds of children and other people too alive.

I will be going to Haiti on August 6-13, with a flight out at an ungodly hour and I couldnt be more excited. I ask that you would keep me and my family in your prayers as we go on this wonderful trip. Thank you
Madelyn

Getting serious

So its been awhile since I have wrote here and since then quite a few things has happened. Number one is that we have moved. We went from Alabama back to good old Minnesota, into a quirky little house but our family loves it. The thing that I wanted to really talk about though is my mental health. So a very personal thing that not a lot of people know about me is that last year I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety, and most recently with ADHD or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Now those things dont always label me some days all I want to do is lay in bed but others I want to go hang out with my friends. Since being diagnosed I have seen two therapists, one while we were living in Alabama and the other back in Minnesota. The one in Minnesota wasnt right for me but we are going to see a new one in a few weeks. When I say we I refer to my amazing parents and more so my Mom who has been so supportive and helpful in helping me help myself. Then I also started to see a Phyciatrist which is someone who deals more with what perscriptions will help me the most. Yes, I take different medications to help me and thats not a bad thing, its actually an amazing thing because they really help.
Something that I want others who are dealing with this is that help is a good thing. Having someone to talk to about what's going on with you and what you are feeling isn't a bad thing which is what people who have never felt this way want you to think. It is a scary thing, having this constant feeling of sadness and sometime feeling like there is nothing or no one here that knows what you are going through. It is important to get help or at least talk to someone about it. Yes, some people might think of you differently but its not them that matters in the end its you and how you feel and what you are putting out there for others to see and then act on how they saw you responding or acting.
It does get better, having someone to talk to or a shoulder to cry on really makes a difference. I want to thank my mom for being with me through this and for leading me the right way. Thank you for always giving me my space and really letting my figure this out on my own all while going to appointments with me and really caring about what I am feeling.
Love you all and just remember that it does get better
Madelyn

Embrace the Mess

I just wanted to talk for a while about embracing the mess that we truly are. Over this past weekend I went to this thing called TCTC which stands for Tennessee Christian Teen Convention and the first session was about labeling and how we not only put labels on other but we also put labels on ourselves. The speaker talked about how we all have basically a shield or a label on or over us to hide whats really happening and going on with us, or the MESS. Now the mess isn't a bad thing in the least, we are all human and have our issues, for example in all honesty I deal with depression and anxiety and I myself label myself as the cheerful happy person and I make it seem like I am living the worlds best life. I think that we should all listen to this and start to let others see who we really are. I realize that yes there is some cases were you might not want everyone to know whats wrong with you but hiding that from other people isn't gonna help anything. This really spoke to me and I think that so many other people should know that its time to embrace the mess.

Thank you
Madelyn

Life

People make life seem so simple and I just want to tell everyone that it's not and that it's okay to feel that way. Coming from personal experience I know that I can get hard sometimes. Being bullied growing up I know what it feels like to feel weird because other people just make life look so much easier, but we may not know what's really going on. We all in a way put on a mask to cover up how we feel, look, and our insecurities. For example, I do not feel like I should post anything on Instagram unless I have makeup on. I think that a lot of this stems from being bullied when I was younger, but really there's nothing to be ashamed of. Everyone isn't perfect, skinny, and beautiful, like those big models like Gigi Hadid and Kendell Jenner, but we don't know, they could be going through depression or an eating disorder. Then there's other models such as Ashley Graham who advocates for people who are a little bigger and who don't always have that confidence that others have.
To all those people who think they are fat, ugly, dumb, too smart, or anything else I just want to tell you that you are wrong. I'm not just saying this to say this I have had personal experiences with these things, I was bullied, I have self-esteem issues and I saying this to help other people who might feel this way. Give yourself a little credit because you have made it through life this far and I know that whatever is happening to you, you can get through this. Personally, if you do feel these ways, I just want to tell you to talk to someone about this, if its a friend, a parent, a sibling, or even a professional, don't wait until you are ready to burst.
Goodbye'
Madelyn Ziegler

My Condolences

I just wanted to make an in between and talk about the terrors that have recently happened in America. Yes, I know that this has nothing against the rest of the world and that there are so many different countries out there who have continued to have horrible things happen to them and my heart goes out to those countries. In this country there has been issue after issue. First there was the hurricanes and I had people that I know that had substantial damage. Then there was the shooting in Las Vegas that was absolutely terrible and heart wrenching, knowing that there was someone out there that did that for no real reason. Then there was the run down in New York that included a man running down people near the Hudson Bay. Then there was the recent shooting in the Texas Church and from what I have read about it, the man was angry at his mother-in-law and he went to the church to shoot her and her fellow worshipers and when he got there she wasn't even there. Just recently there was a shooting in the small town that I grew up in with two casualties.
I would like to make something perfectly clear though, I am not against guns, I'm against gun violence but I don't think that just because there are people in this world with so much hate in their hearts that everyone is bad and that they should not have that right to protect themselves. There are the rare cases where someone uses a gun to shoot and kill others but that also means that there's also people out there that in extreme cases are able to use their weapons to protect themselves and others. Take for example one of my dad's, he is a police officer and he does carry a gun around with him to most places that he goes. That does not mean that he is going to use it to kill innocent people for no reason but instead defend and protect those people who are in harm's way.
Yet again I feel so much pain for those who are affected by this gun violence and my condolences are to you and your families.

Lots of love,
Madelyn

There and back

There is a reason that I choose this to be the title of my newest blog post and that is because of what's going on in the country today. We started off as a new eager country ready to become independent and its own and then we went to war with each other. Many lives were lost and many people were without loved ones. Then we found it within ourselves to sort out our issues and really become one again and now we are right back to a nation divided. Whatever standpoint you have listen here. We are going to cause so much pain and heartbreak if we continue on the path that we are on. 

The National Anthem is a time for us to stand and show our respect to those who have given their lives so that ungrateful people can throw around a ball for a couple hours and make millions off of it. I don't think that people not standing for the anthem is really going to get people anywhere, and I don't think that most of the people who are kneeling are doing it for "equality" I think they are doing it for a small amount of attention. I don't know what they are complaining about because there are so many people in worse conditions than they are. The people who lost their houses and lives due to the recent string of hurricanes or the people who never once in there live had a full stomach. Don't go around acting like you have a hard life because at least you have a house to go to at the end of the night and food to feed you are your children. I once did a missions trip down to Haiti and you won't believe the devastation and pain that they have all gone through and how little they have yet how grateful they are.
So listen up you entitled NFL players you have no right to go around disrespecting this nation and the people who risk their lives for you, and I totally stand by all those people who are protesting the NFL because I do to, and after President Trump spoke out about it and all the hate that he got I think that he should enforce a rule about kneeling because it is not okay now nor has it ever been okay.

That is all that I have to say on this subject.

Thank you

-Madelyn

School

So if you don't already know I am homeschooled. My parents took my family out of public school the summer between 7th and 8th grade. So while everyone else is doing the whole going to school and spending 8 hours on things that I can get done in 2 I'm sitting at home just about ready to punch a person. So yesterday was the first day of school for me unlike many other people who started it about a month ago, my sister and me are doing the same program for school and yesterday the site crashed from all the people are starting school and doing it, so it was about 2 in the afternoon yesterday when I actually had the chance to start school. Then today I went back to start school done again and I had the chance to read the lesson for math and then it crashed... again. I really want to get my school done so that I can do other things but instead I'm sitting here watching this rubix cube turn around and around and around. I know this is gonna sound strange but I actually like school and I like learning new things and growing my knowledge of the world around me. I don't think it would be that bad but I see all these people who are done with school and when they are done they're done but I'm sitting here feeling completely useless and I really don't like that feeling. Now that my rant is done I really want to wish everyone a good and successful school year and I hope that they just let loose and really enjoy it. I realize that it's not that easy for everyone but just remember that this is the beginning of your life and to really pay attention so that you can use the things that you learn in your future life.

The Future

     I'm not going to lie, seeing the way that the world is going right now I can already tell what the future might be like. This is just coming from my view of the people who are the future, it can't be that good. Most children that I have experienced have a sense of entitlement, like they run the world and that they can do whatever they want with no repercussions. I'm not saying that that is ever child out there but I've had a lot of run ins with children that don't get there way and when they don't get their way they throw fits and are highly disrespectful.

     Also in the future, the world will be controlled by technology. Even now the most important thing to people is technology, and their social medias. Almost all the jobs here today there is technology involved, and without technology the world would be in total chaos. The world is run by technology, phones, computers, iPad’s these things are what this country is running on. The future does scare me, and I really want the Lord to come before we must see the direction that the world is turning into. Even the teens of today are growing up thinking that everything should be handed to them and that they really shouldn't have to work for what they need. I'm not saying that everyone is like that and honestly this is what I think the future might turn into but you never know what will really happen and who knows the world might turn around and be just fine.

Social "Normals"

There is a certain standard that people everywhere are supposed to fit in to. There is a picture of the perfect female and the perfect male, females are to be skinny and tall and have pretty hair and eyes, and if you don't look like this then you are put down and made fun of. Men to have a standard that they have to fit into, they have to be tall, a six pack, and very muscular. When you see the average models they are models who are to almost unhealthily skinny. They also have models that are a little bit bigger then the other models, and they are referred to as "plus size" and being someone who would be categorized as "plus size" I don't imagine that that feels very good, beings pushed into the plus sized category. Study's show that the average size for women,s clothes are a size 16, but if you are a size 16 then in the eyes of society you are "fat" and "overweight". In my opinion it shouldn't matter how much you weigh and what size you are for clothing because if you are confident in your body and your size and you are healthy then honestly it shouldn't matter to anyone other then you. The way that you feel about yourself should be based squarely on you and not anyone other then yourself because in the end everyone else doesn't matter. I grew up not being confident in my body and listening to what everyone else said about me but now I know that it doesn't matter what they think because I'm healthy and happy and that is all that really matters. So just remember that what really matters is how you feel and how you think about yourself, and don't listen to those people that are not okay with you size that they don't really matter because they aren't perfect themselves.


-Lots of  Love
Madelyn